In the recent past in an obscure kingdom tucked away among the Alps reigned a decorous king, ruling the monarch in a line of monarchs that stretched back to the Middle Ages. King Morton esteemed values. He would have none of this drivel of dropping “sir” and “ma’am” when addressing one’s elders, nor could he tolerate modern jargon, especially outdated jargon. “Awesome” should refer to things that actually inspire; “cool” ought to mean the temperature.
He became livid in the subject of modern gadgets – just so much folderol, in his opinion. Downloading movies on iPhones would guarantee eye problems when children reached his distinguished age. Moreover, didn’t they realize that cell phones were intended for use outside the home? Only yesterday the palace accountant had vehemently complained to him that the younger of his two daughters had accumulated one thousand text messages on her cell phone in a single week! Worse, she was texting for amusement to her own sister, Maribella, who lived in the same place! When he demanded it back, Dorinda had inarticulately mumbled something about not being able to locate it.
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